Posts filed under ‘advocate’
The big “C” and the stress it brings
Someone, even you, may have been diagnosed with cancer. Does it just affect the one diagnosed? No, it affects family and friends too. The caregiver is often told to – “Be strong”, “You need to handle everything so that the “patient” doesn’t have to worry about anything else.”, “Don’t bother the “patient” with any household needs.”, “Just buck up and handle it.” and I’m sure many other words of supposed wisdom. The stress increases if your caregiver is your spouse.
The diagnosis is made and you are in shock for a while. Then, you marshall your strength, decide on a plan and work the plan. Oh yeah, just because you have a plan doesn’t mean it will work out quite like it should have. Change. That will be the one constant thing in this whole process. Good days and bad days. Grumpy and tired days. Mad at the world days and madder still at your spouse days. Step back and look at the real issue. This situation stinks and you’re both scared and stressed to the max. Others mean well and are willing to help if told about what needs to be handled. Let someone help with the inside and outside house work, cook a few meals and do a little laundry. Your friends and families cannot read your mind nor do they want to cause you more stress by overstepping their bounds. Communication, it’s a good thing. Would you help them if they were in your situation? Don’t be stubborn and don’t rob someone of a blessing for helping someone they care about.
Navigating the health care system, making appointments, going to the appointments, waiting, and a myriad of other issues to handle will make anyone stressed. The increased stress and anxiety will make even the healthiest person very ill over time. Men usually complain of body aches and pain and women have increased headaches and stomach problems. Women tend to talk more of how they are feeling and that seems to relieve some of the stress and anxiety of the situation. Men do not talk as freely and sometimes turn to other means (vices) to lessen their stress and anxiety.
Communication, it’s a good thing. Remember that the person that you love the most and would do anything for – is not for use as a verbal punching bag. It’s okay to get mad and yell about the situation; just let the other person know you are yelling about the situation and not at them. Once words have been said they cannot be unheard.
This dry cough will not go away!
It could be your allergies or it could be your blood pressure medication.
